When I watched the Dynamite music video with my sister six months ago, I never knew my life would change. I simply thought I would be watching a K-pop music video, same as always (see, we used to watch TWICE music videos on repeat, it was sort of a part of our usual routine). I never knew it would be the start of such a change in me. Now, I know what you’re thinking,—that’s too exaggerated to be true. Oh, but dear reader, it is the truth. My life changed because I realized BTS gave me so much energy and motivation, taught me to love and cherish myself, inspired me and encouraged me in different ways. And most importantly, I realized I found comfort and healing in BTS. Something I never really thought would happen.
The thing is, I wasn’t a fan of them then. I only knew two of their songs: IDOL and Boy with Luv (which I both loved, but again, I haven’t turned into a fan yet). I thought their fandom, the BTS ARMY, was intimidating so I never bothered trying to know more about the band itself. (I know, I know! I’m deeply sorry I judged too quickly. Oh, how wrong was I.) But when I watched that music video and listened to the song, I wasn’t thinking about their fandom or their popularity. I was simply enjoying their music, basking in their vocals, absorbing their visuals. And my sister (bless her heart, I firmly believe I wouldn’t be writing this blog partly if it weren’t for her as well) started to ramble on about their names and their stage names, about their songs, and how she started stanning them (spoiler alert: it was because she saw Namjoon with purple hair in Not Today). And I found myself wanting to know more about these seven boys, and I wanted to know more about their other songs, and I wanted to play Dynamite on repeat. So, I did just that.
The more I listened to Dynamite, the more I started to like them. The more I listened to their other songs, the more I found myself in awe of how much depth and range they have. The more I dissected their lyrics, the more I grasped their words and loved their perspective in love and in life. The more I cherished their message and knew them one by one, the more I found comfort and healing and inspiration.
Epiphany had me loving myself…and bawling my eyes out while I was in the middle of my shift at work. (Seokjin’s emotions and vocals in that song are out of this world). Spring Day (which I later found out is one of their most iconic songs, four years in and it still hasn’t left the charts) had me missing my family and friends, and a significant other I didn’t even have (literally, this song has so much story and emotion). Magic Shop, on the other hand, helped me release the stress I have in my heart and mind, and trust the people around me and/or the people I love. Whalien 52, with its message of loneliness and not being able to connect or be heard by others, was especially relatable for me, more particularly, younger me. And Black Swan (which honestly deserves a Grammy award itself) moved me and touched my heart as a creative, with its primary message of dealing with burnout and confronting the fear of having no inspiration to create art.
Speaking of Black Swan, this leads me to my realization. Perhaps another reason why my appreciation for BTS escalated so much in such a short amount of time, was the fact that I discovered them and their music at a time when I was feeling mentally exhausted. I had been feeling restless and stressed then, tired not just because of my regular work, but mostly because of my blogging/reviewing endeavors. Now, don’t get me wrong, this blog and my platforms, but I unfortunately pushed myself too hard that time. To put it simply, I was feeling burned out. And it was not fun. However, discovering BTS, listening to their songs… it’s like I was suddenly invigorated. The joy of listening to new music, or reading a thrilling book, or looking at a painting in a museum and feeling all the emotions and thoughts evoke inside you. That’s what it felt like for me. That’s what BTS felt like for me.
But that’s not all though, of course. Their songs in general are just a joy to listen to. And their artistry and lyricism (specifically Namjoon’s) thoroughly impressed me. Add that to the fact that they are seven amazingly talented and wholesome people who have been through tough times, but still want to make music, perform, and spread love. There’s Namjoon (RM), there’s Seokjin (JIN), Yoongi (SUGA), Hoseok (J-HOPE), Jimin, Taehyung (V), and Jungkook. These boys managed to turn my life around, and I know the rest of the BTS ARMY will agree me when I say that I can’t honestly imagine my life without BTS and their music anymore. In the end, I’ve finally realized why BTS has such a huge following, why their fans hold them in such high regard, why the fans have so much passion and love for these boys. I understand all of that now.
Looking back, I kind of feel sad and guilty that I didn’t discover and like them sooner. But then I’m reminded of Yoongi’s words, saying that the day we discover them is the day they debuted. I think this truly means BTS came to me when I needed them the most. And damn, I couldn’t be happier.
(And also, before I wrap up this personal, non-bookish blog, HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIN YOONGI. I thought it was only fitting that I post this on one of their birthdays. And I fortunately have a soft spot for Yoongi, producer/rapper extraordinaire. 💜)
Also…pst. Do you also stan BTS? What’s your favorite song? Who’s your bias?! Come talk to me in the comments or on social!